What We Do in the Shadows Quotes

– What We Do in the Shadows Quotes –

The dialogue in the series, what We Do in the Shadows is funny and amusing, keeping viewers chuckling till the end. It was produced by Jemaine Clement and debuted on FX on March 27, 2019. Read on to enjoy this what we do in the shadows quotes selected for you.

What We Do in the Shadows Quotes

Four vampires and their human companions are coping with the difficulties of modern American life. Chill off with some of the quotes from this movie.

1. “They Only Made Four. They Gave One To Henry Ford And Then He Gave His One To His Hero, Mussolini.” – Laszlo Cravensworth

2. “If I ever find out who did it, I will take a dagger and stab them 5,000 times with this hand! Switch hands. And then stab them another 5,000 times!” —Garrett

3. “Why aren’t they wearing capes? Looks like anyone can be a vampire in Mana-hatta!” —Laszlo

4. “If I find I’m in a situation where an idiot is complaining to me, you can either kill them or you can pretend to listen to them.” —Nandor  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

5. “There Is Nothing More Devastating Than Finding Out Your Husband Has Made [Adult Movies]… And It’s So Bloody Boring.” – Nadja Of Antipaxos

6. The way Matt Berry pronounces words while playing any of his characters is hysterical, and he delivers the goods as Laszlo when he and his friends visit a club in Mana-hatta.

7. It’s nice to see Nadja’s compassionate side. When she comes across virgin LARPer Jenna (Beanie Feldstein), she takes pity on this young woman when she sees how the men in her life mistreat her. Though she eventually turns her into a murderous vampire, it’s heartwarming to see Nadja looking out for her fellow woman.

8. In classic Shadows fashion, we see Nandor shopping for party decorations at a supermarket, and this whole fish-out-of-water situation is too funny. And the way he pronounces “crepe paper” is just priceless.

Funny Quotes

9. Fans get a chance to see the full extent of Colin’s powers when he unintentionally gets a promotion in the office. With his co-workers forced to laugh at his corny jokes and tolerate his awkward interactions, he has an unlimited pool of energy to draw from.

10. That’s not a nice thing to say to a friend you used to terrorize when they were little.

11.”I’ll be honest with you. My lookalike is kind of giving me a chub.” —Colin

12. Laszlo just can’t help but blurt out innuendos.

13. At least we know Colin has a good self-image.

14. “We sent ravens. We sent 500 RAVENS! I’m shocked and appalled that you didn’t raven us back.” —The Guide

15. “She said that my pornos were boring, which is an unbelievable reaction. I showed her a century’s worth of my pornos. That’s a lot of porn. I don’t think she followed the plots.” —Laszlo

16. “How are you supposed to be a strong, thrilling, powerful warrior and love with a name like Jeff? It is like a weak ejaculation! Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh. Jeff.” —Nadja

17. He doesn’t sound very…what was the word, again?

18. When the vampires are put on trial for “vampicide,” one of the witnesses argues against them, and Laszlo comes up with a hilarious counterargument.

19. “Do you remember that first time we made love? It was so passionate, I accidentally cut off your head.” —Nadja “what we do in the shadows quotes”

20. Only Nadja could make the name “Jeff” into an insult. After watching this episode, you will never be able not to think of it when the name comes up.

Quotes and Saying

21. The energy vampire shows the camera crew that he’s carefully curated a playlist of 25 copies of “Hey There Delilah.” He then pulls out a bag of trail mix, explaining that its sole purpose is to be stuffed into the seats of the car. The psychic vampire has truly mastered the art of annoying others in even the smallest ways.

22. Gizmo really does a good impression of Laszlo.

23. “This Is Not A Joke!” – Nandor

24. “I Talked To Rob, He Didn’t Wanna Come. He Wants To Leave It Behind.”

25. “Look at the pictures on the glass! It’s the Jeebus man!” —Laszlo

26. “You are supposed to support me when I want to murder someone!” —Nadja

27. “You people are as much fun as the plague. Remember the plague? And how much fun it was? That’s this.” —The Baron  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

28. “Vampire Sex Is Like Pizza In That Even When It’s Bad It’s Good. It’s Designed To Be Enjoyed By 8 Or More People.” – Nandor The Relentless

29. Everyone has bad experiences with their first time, but this is ridiculous.

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Entertaining Quotes

30. For those of you who don’t know what that word means, you’re gonna have to look it up yourself. Be careful, though.

31. When Dave Bautista stars as a vampire wrongfully convicted for one of Laszlo’s crimes, he makes a threat that is delivered in hilarious Bautista fashion. You can definitely hear Drax saying this.

32. “Gizmo, get the dildos. Gizmo, try out the dildos. Hmm, how are the dildos? They’re fine.” —Guillermo  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

33. “I was relentless. They would call me Nandor the Relentless. Because I would just never relent.” —Nandor

34. This is pretty much every human frat boy ever.

35. “Pablo Picasso. More like Pablo Picasshole.” —Nadja

36. Colin reveals that this influence doesn’t matter as much when others only see him as an annoying energy vampire, though. In a simultaneously moving and hilarious moment, he puts a spin on the popular quote “I don’t live to work, I work to live.” He thankfully remembers his mantra and goes back to normal after nearly draining his roommates to death.

37. “It’s a big, bloody stupid hat with a big, bloody stupid curse on it, and every time you wear it, something bloody stupid terrible happens!” —Nadja  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

38. Throughout the series, we see Nadja recount her struggles growing up in a poor village, and despite how sad they are, they are just nonsensical and hilarious. You have to wonder if Natasia Demetriou makes up all these stories on the spot during filming.

39. “I was a very ferocious soldier in the Ottoman Empire. Which meant a lot of killing, and  lot of pillaging. People would say, ‘Please don’t pillage me!’ And I would say, ‘No, I’m pillaging everyone, you included.’” —Nandor

Dialogue Sayings

40. “I Have Recently Re-Discovered My Love For Topiary Sculpture. The Art Of Bush Manipulation.” – Laszlo Cravensworth

41. “What kind of goat sorcery is this?” —Laszlo

42. “We were so poor, we used to use donkey dung for fuel, and when the donkey dung ran out, we would have to burn the donkey.” —Nadja

43. “You are just a lovely guy that I took very strong sex with a couple hundred thousand times, and then my husband cut your head off. Move on!” —Nadja

44. “I am just a stupid human man. Oh, ouch, ouch, my balls. I love to drink beer.” —Nadja

45. That’s probably not how a healthy marriage works.

46. “Creepy paper. Creepy paper. Creepy-oh! Multipack!” —Nandor

47. Everyone knows that vampires are afraid of anything holy and religious, and Laszlo perfectly expresses his fear of going into a church when Nandor decides to attend a funeral. He can’t even say Jesus’s name right.

48. “No, I know what you’re bloody like! If you eat the mean one, you’re gonna be mean all evening!” —Nadja  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

49. “One Human Alcohol Beer, Please.” – Jim

50. “I Don’t Live To Drain, I Drain To Live.” – Colin Robinson

51. Guillermo: “‘Laszlo sucks,’ backwards.” Laszlo: “Laszlo doesn’t suck! And if he did, he certainly wouldn’t do it backwards!”

52. The number of clever one-liners this show comes up with is just incredible.

53. We’ve all had our hearts broken at least once in our lives, but the show takes it to a new level when Nadja drives away the spirit of her reincarnated lover after getting his head cut off for the millionth time.

Great Quotes

54. “She used to be such a cute, little fresh-faced girl. But now she just looks like an elephant’s knee.” —Nadja

55. “No, no. Nandor, that’s the Stairmaster, the master of the stairs.” —Laszlo

56. “And we are truly sorry, and we are taking this very seriously, and these are our serious faces. Serious. Serious. Serious.” —Laszlo

57. They all say they watch it for the plot, and they never do. But that porn parody of Seinfeld that Laszlo does looks promising.  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

58. “It says I am 100% white.” —Colin

59. The Baron: “You know what I’ve always wanted to try?” Laszlo: “Coprophilia.” Laszlo: “No, pizza pie! Is it as wonderful as they say?” *Turns to Laszlo* “Coprophilia?”

60. An old portrait of Nandor in ” What We Do in the Shadows”

61. The man doesn’t discriminate. He pillages people equally.

62. So apparently, vampires use ravens instead of phones. Does that mean they use parrots as voicemails?

63. A pretty accurate statement from a guy who’s high on drug blood.

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More What We Do in the Shadows Quotes

64.”We have total dominion from here to here!” —Laszlo

65.“I Will Always Be Just A Familiar To Them. Just A Schlub, Driving Around Brooklyn, With A Bunch Of Jars Full Of Semen.” – Guillermo De La Cruz

66.”There is nothing more devastating than finding out your husband has made porn…and it’s so bloody boring.” —Nadja

67. That’s a very succinct description of yourself.

68. Veteran actor Doug Jones is hands down the best side character as Baron Afanas. He delivers each of his lines with wicked glee, and this is one of the Baron’s best as the ancient vampire tries to loosen up and have a fun night.

69. The vampires barely have any territory in Staten Island, but the way Laszlo dramatically declares it is just hilarious.  “what we do in the shadows quotes”

70. When the vampires’ house becomes haunted by ghosts, one of them leaves a terrifying note for Laszlo. Of course, he misinterprets the message and gives us one of his cleverest comebacks ever.

71.“All I Know Is I Haven’t Had A Whiff Of Wu Or Tang.” – Laszlo Cravensworth

72.”Be strong, sweet little one. Someday they will all be dead and you will do a shit on all of their graves.” —Nadja

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StudentsandScholarship Team.